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Being a good friend has always been high on your priority list. You work hard to build and maintain relationships and you are lucky to have strong friends in your corner. You’ve seen each other through babies and career moves. Postpartum depression and school bullies. But now you’re in uncharted territory. Something you feared would enter your circle at some point, but hoped never would.

Your best friend has called you and said the D-word. Through tears, she sobs out that she and her partner have filed for divorce. The line goes quiet and suddenly, it’s your turn. But what…


And how I’m dealing with it

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My aunt posted a meme yesterday. It showed President Obama talking to Jesus Christ. Obama is complaining that Donald Trump reversed all of his policies. Jesus replies “Well you reversed all of mine, that’s why I sent Trump.”

Let me start off with a little background. My family and friends are mostly Mormon. They have deep religious beliefs and live by a strict set of guidelines for themselves. They don’t drink, smoke, or watch R-rated movies. They hold sexual purity (no sex until marriage and complete fidelity afterward) at the very top of their…


And how it affected their self-esteem

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I recently got divorced, and it forced me to really take a look at my parenting. I didn’t have a husband anymore to help me make decisions, and I felt like I was being put on the spot with my kids all the time.

Not only was I navigating new parenting territory, but my kids were also dealing with emotions they’d never felt before. These high stake emotions times four kids- plus me being a solo parent made it feel like I was drowning.

I was in the middle of trying to heal myself…


Especially if you hope Trump wins

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I put my ten-year-old to bed last night before Texas had been counted. He doesn’t quite understand electoral votes completely, but he was concerned.

“Mom, if Trump wins, will you and Liza get married right away, just in case?”

His eyes were watery. He was trying to be brave.

“A wedding would just be really fun, you guys love each other. You should just get married… it would be fun.”

He was trying to be cool, calm. …


And why I really hope you don’t

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Growing up Mormon, I was taught early and often, that my virginity (or purity as it was called) was my most important possession. I needed to guard it fervently and was to repent vigorously if it was compromised. I took this as seriously as a young teenaged girl could. I had several boyfriends and we never got close to having sex, but I still found myself feeling shame and sorrow anytime I wanted to. …


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I spent an entire hour with my therapist today talking about stupid people. I know I shouldn’t call people stupid. But seriously. I just can’t take it anymore.

I live in a predominately White, predominately Christian farming town. We have very little diversity. And we share our religion like, a lot. We also, apparently, share a lot of stupid shit on the internet.

I have been completely dumbfounded how easily the people that I am constantly surrounded by and genuinely like are sharing the most ignorant and uneducated pieces of “information” online.

Last night, for instance, a sweet young newly…


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As a white woman trying to unlearn the racism in me, I have to admit… I’m more confused than ever.

I began this journey knowing I wasn’t racist because I value all human life. Period. I don’t hate and I don’t discriminate. Then, I learned more. And I realized, like many of us, that racism is so much deeper than that. It involves systemic injustices that I’ve been silent about. It involves prejudices so deeply rooted by my education that I didn’t even realize I had them.

Some White Americans, like myself, have leaned into the process of discomfort and…


Finding myself and Jesus all at the same time

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When I started to think I might be gay… I immediately started to doubt my faith. How could something about myself feel so good and true but also be so wrong in the eyes of the religion I grew up in?

Determining whether or not I was gay or if I was on a different area of the sexuality spectrum was something that took me a long time, and if I’m being honest is something I’m still figuring out.

What I did know, however, was that what I was feeling and…


What Does Defund The Police Mean

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I’m a 36-year-old white mother of four that lives in rural Idaho. There are a handful of black people in the town I live in. And by handful, I mean five.

Race issues aren’t at the forefront of things we deal with. We’re mostly Religious people who are earnestly trying to treat everyone equally. We make mistakes of course, but in terms of hate, there’s not much of that going on around here.

In the past few weeks, as race issues have dominated the country, I have found myself digging deep into how I…


A rebuttal to Candace Owens

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Several of my white, thirty-something friends have shared and reposted a video of Candace Owens this week. Owens, a black, female, Pro-Trump activist details in her video why she won’t support seeing George Floyd as a martyr. She argues that protesters and the Black Lives Matter campaign are painting a picture of Floyd that isn’t accurate. She goes on in the video to point out Floyd’s previous convictions, character flaws, and struggle with substance abuse.

Owens is adamant that the entire movement, spurred into effect by George Floyd’s life is a step in the right…

Harper May

Lover of writing, babies and good coffee.

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